Monday, April 27, 2015

Why I Disdain My Life

What is this life without love? George is a sad excuse for a husband. We do not love each other. He thinks he loves me but he wouldn’t know what love was if it hit him in the back of the head. There is no spark, no passion. He is a boring man who owns a gas station. But Tom is so much more. He is a rich, sophisticated, high class man who knows how to treat a girl. Just last week he bought me a dog at the snap of my fingers. Yes, he struck me and in the moment of course I was upset, but a little money can cover that up and boy does he have enough of it. You might ask why I am so desperate to get away from George but I mean look at the options. Oh if I was with Tom my whole life would be different. I can only imagine. Instead of living in grime and filth I would live where a lady like me should, in riches. But I can’t have this can I? And why you may ask? Because the whole flipping universe is against me! I will never be as good as that golden girl daisy to Tom. He is proud of her, what a trophy she is to all who see him, so what does that make me? Obviously Tom sees me as a shame and does not compare to me to any sort of trophy. I should have more self-respect and ditch him but as much as Tom might be ashamed of me I can’t help but fall deeper and deeper in love with him in the hope that one day he might come to his senses and tell me to pack my backs and get ready to leave with him. This life I lead is full of hopeless love and never being good enough so why wouldn’t I disdain it? 

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